Amazon Game Studios’ New World managed to launch, not without a few issues, but an everlasting theme with New World even before release was the lack of mounts.

“No mounts for you, go ahead walkies,” the developer says.

“You’re just shooting a Guild Wars 2,” replies the playerbase (a game that was launched without a mount before possibly adding them).

So the game approaches this through a certain tradition: a note you find titled “The Animal Revolt” which is titled “Notice of Concern for Carters and Porters” written by “your friendly local doctor”.

It must be the dumbest explanation on the planet.

It reads:

“After a recent spate of back injuries, Aeternum’s medics feel compelled to issue this warning to anyone transporting goods between settlements:

“Please remember that there are NO workhorses on Aeternum. No horse or donkey will pull your cart, carry your bag, or tolerate a rider. domesticating these animals only resulted in injuries and a lot of swearing.

“Therefore, it is important to carry ONLY as much cargo as your own back can support. Do not overload your bags or carts. This is not the Old World. In Aeternum we all have to pull our own weight.

“Your joints will thank you!”

So … the horses revolted? It seems like this should be reflected more in the world than it is (see also: All New World Traditions) – like maybe we should have spent the first hour fighting graminivorous quadrupeds rather than mini Dr. Manhattans?

Anyway, now we know that you can’t have a mount in the New World because apparently they’re just attacking people. Check back in a few months for the retcon!